The journey to wellbeing begins with taking care of your mental health. Accepting both your mind and body as they are is the starting point to getting there. For some of us, reaching that ideal state of a healthy mind and body can be more challenging, whereas for others, their nature and nurture balance facilitates this process. This page is intended to help those who, like me, are aware of the importance of self-care and are using tools to support this journey (therapy, psychotropics, podcasts, exercise, books, meditation, etc.) However, even with the most noble intentions, when it comes to a healthy mind and body, there are times when things simply don’t work in your favor.
Some days you are in control. You have the right mix of self-help mantras, you are eating healthy, and you can talk to your therapist or close friend, and that is when things are great. Some other days none of these things seem to work; you feel stuck, defeated and hopeless.
My goal is to use this page as a refuge for the not-so-great days – a place where I can be reminded of the science behind wellbeing, psychology, the strategies, the vast amount of evidence, and resources that many others have used to help us focus on the bright side of things instead of the negative stuff we tend to be obsessed with.
This website is an ongoing project. It grows periodically as I incorporate resources I have come across throughout the years as someone struggling with anxiety and depression since I became a teenager almost 30 years ago. Moreover, as a psychology instructor, academic advisor, corporate trainer, mom, wife, immigrant, woman (the identities are endless), I have found elements that keep me afloat when things don’t work properly, and I am sure I will find many more along the way. There is something I discover in articles, websites, or books that raises my awareness to things I know can be helpful, but somehow I forget about. So this page is my memory aid.
I don’t wish to wait until I have collected all the pieces that in my mind will result in a “perfect” wellbeing website, as this will be an unrealistic task. Instead, this site is published and is out there for the virtual world to see as it grows little by little, helping you and me along the process.
Challenge the negative mind
This is a cheat sheet I have saved in my phone which I look at whenever I am stuck with negativism. Also a resource that grows with me. Some of these points are quotes from readings which means citations will be incorporated soon.
- It is not what you think. People and the environment are not a threat to you.
- Try a little bit harder.
- Don’t draw conclusions without proper context.
- Your perception is biased due to negative affectivity (negativity bias)
- Positive attracts others and you get support. Transform the negative thought into a positive statement.
- Please go for positive affectivity. Negativity isolates you.
- Radical acceptance: Let go of any expectations.
- Practice compassion with yourself.
- Take a five minute pause: deep breathing, positive thinking.
- Practice gratitude.
- Move some items from today’s to do list to tomorrow’s list.
- Practice Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
- Take a grounding pause: find 3 colors you see, 3 textures you feel, and 3 sounds you hear.
- You are the greatest example for your kids. How you handle problems now is how they will handle theirs in the future.