There are so many emotions, thoughts and behaviors that are part of who we are. It is not intended to downplay any of them here, but to raise awareness about those which can negativity impact self-acceptance.
Brené Brown skillfully defines perfectionism in her latest book, Atlas of the Heart:
Perfectionism is a self-destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: ” if I Iook perfect, I live perfect, work perfectly and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of blame, judgement and shame”.
Perfectionism is not self-improvement. It is about trying to earn approval and acceptance.
“I am what I accomplish and how well I accomplish it”